Stop Sabotaging Your Own Happiness and Put Your Own Life First!
In order to be in a healthy, functioning, long lasting relationship, one must know themselves. In knowing yourself, you must be prepared to take stock of your life, your dreams and your goals. Many people, women especially, have a hard time allowing themselves to be fulfilled on a spiritual, physical, mental and emotional level.
With all of the pressures of family, friends, lovers, work and children, women often find themselves at the back of the happiness line, so to speak; chasing after a “goal” they can never seem to achieve. Happiness is always a destination to certain people, not a journey, and many women find themselves lost along the way.
Today on Facebook, I read an interesting quote from one of my cousins. The quote read:
“A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces that she never did care for pie.”
This quote prompted me to review twodaymag contributor and best-selling author, Kristen Houghton’s book, And THEN I’ll Be Happy! Stop Sabotaging Your Happiness and Put Your Own Life First. In this amazing book that every woman (and empathetic man) should have by their nightstand, she points out how neglecting your own needs (no matter what they may be) can only lead to a disenchanted, unfulfilled and unhappy life.
Houghton believes men have a better grasp of putting their own happiness first, while women end up last on their list. This point was greatly reinforced when I read a male’s response to my cousin’s quote on her page.
He stated (ever so practically) “Sounds like someone needs to cut them slices a lil smaller.”
This struck me as a simple solution, yet one that I didn’t think of. Everyone can get a piece of the pie if no one is over indulged.
Houghton writes, “You were born happy; you were programmed to be unhappy. Decide what is important to you and balance your life.”
This book touches on every aspect of what it is to be a woman in society who can’t say “no” to other people’s needs. Many women feel as though if they put their own needs first, that they will be considered selfish. Houghton's insights into the female mind by using stories of experience to explain why we sabotage our own happiness are of great value to any woman.
By ignoring ourselves, by putting our own dreams and goals on a back burner to satisfy others, women have allowed themselves to become overstressed, overworked, under appreciated, and underdeveloped.
Houghton interviewed several women for her book and used their life struggles to discuss issues that prevent women from being happy in their every day life.
Some women had to have a man no matter what, even if they played the part of the dutiful mistress. Some were dealing with depression, drug or alcohol addiction in relationships. Others felt guilty if they weren’t behaving like a “good girl”; while many felt compelled to work harder and longer hours at their job to prove their worth. Some put school on hold to take care of family members, while others created the “perfect” family situation for themselves, only to have a nervous breakdown in the process. We can all identify with one or more of these situations.
All of the women were connected by their inability to be happy, by their belief that happiness could wait, or by deluding themselves into thinking that other people could make them happy.
Houghton’s straightforward, honest and inspiring analysis of each situation, along with a plan to rediscover and reclaim your own happiness kept me turning the pages late into the night.
If you want to become empowered, take control of your life and stop sabotaging your happiness, I guarantee this book is for you. Once you fully grasp that you are important, your life does matter, and that your happiness is of value, life will become more pleasurable and you will become more loving and tolerant of the most important person in your life. You.
As Houghton states in her book, “Stop being your own worst enemy. Be your own best friend, instead!”