Two Day Magazine

Language is a powerful tool. Possibly the most powerful tool that we as humans have learned to wield over the years. Words can inspire, words can demoralize, and words can shape the course of our humanity. And depending on the context...words can take on different meanings, like chameleons changing color right before your eyes.

Take the word “bitch” for example. According to the dictionary, the definition of bitch is as follows: (Be prepared...it has a lot of different uses!)

In other shocking news, the sky is blue.

Many amazing records have been broken this year at the Olympics, including world-renowned swimmer, Michael Phelps’ astonishing 20 medal achievement, the most ever awarded to any Olympian in the history of the sport. But, the record that seems to be receiving the most attention is the fact that more condoms than ever, 150,000 to be exact, have been given away (free!) at the Olympics this year in London.

By: Mia Bencivenga

If you are like me, you detest celebrity gossip websites.  You view them as everything that is wrong with society; they are invasive, catty, and profit off of the alleged misconducts of stars and their loved ones.

Oh, to have the life of a evangelical professional football player. Or wait a minute...maybe not.

In case you haven’t heard, AshleyMadison.com is offering one million dollars to any woman who can prove that she has had sexual intercourse with Tim Tebow. I know, sleazy right? But then again, when your website helps people to cheat on their spouses, what do you expect?

By: Mia Bencivenga

First of all, let me first state that I know no intimate details about Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart’s relationship.  It could be marvelous, stupendous, the paradigm of health and happiness, etc., etc…

Either way, I have no idea.  Jennifer and I aren’t what you’d call “tight.”

What little I know is what I see on the covers of magazines and the stories they run when it’s a slow news day on ABC; shortly after the dissolution Jennifer Lopez’s third marriage, Ms. Lopez was already said to be dating a Mr. Casper Smart, a backup dancer who is some fifteen years her junior.

By: Mia Bencivenga

What have we done America?

Nicole Polizzi, better known as “Snooki,” is a Chilean-born guidette meatball who has previously appeared on MTV’s much discussed reality television show, The Jersey Shore.  

In case you are unfamiliar, The Jersey Shore is, what I believe, to be an elaborate test on planet Earth’s tolerance for talentless narcissists, that was created by aliens from another planet who infiltrated MTV posing as that cool new-aged European producer, to see if we are capable of understanding and accepting complex truths about the universe and our place in it.

And for the record; we have failed miserably. The aliens are so frightened that they’ve gone back their home planet, and will most definitely go to their local space bar to do their best to repress us from their abnormally large frontal lobes via zero gravity enhanced Jell-O shots.

By: Mia Bencivenga

Forgive and forget.  That is what we are taught to do from a very young age.

It’s supposed to be what is best for us.  Once you forgive someone, you do your best to forget what they have done so that you can get on with your life.  But sometimes, this advice appears to not be prudent or wise—especially when it comes to relationships.  Sometimes, you really shouldn’t forget.

When singer Chris Brown first came on the scene, he was a very promising young talent.  With his boyish features, incredible aptitude for performing, and pop-friendly radio hits, some were hailing him as the next “big thing.”  

Then, as we all can recall, he physically assaulted Rihanna after the Grammy awards in 2009.  After the incident, Brown’s skyrocketing career took a temporary nose dive. 

By: Mia Bencivenga

In the days and weeks to come, we’ll probably learn what caused the death of singer Whitney Houston. Given her long, tumultuous relationship with drugs, many people have already reached their own conclusions.

Whitney Houston is certainly not the first female pop star to lose her battle with drug addiction, if that is what killed her. Within the past year, other women with unmistakable talent and amazing voices have died; Amy Winehouse at the young age of 27, and Etta James at age 73.

Recently, Newsweek ran a story about former U.S. Senator, and Catholic enthusiast, Rick Santorum, and his wife’s sordid sexual past. That’s right. You read that correctly. Not only does Santorum’s wife have a sexual past...but it’s a pretty scandalous one at that. Well, for the 80s.

Rick Santorum has been extremely outspoken about his stance on women’s rights over bodily autonomy. He is pro-life and proud of it. His wife, Karen, is also a staunch pro-lifer and mother to their seven children, all of which are home schooled. Santorum often refers to his wife’s book, Letters to Gabriel, which is the story of their tragic 1997 miscarriage on the campaign trail. This couple is fiercely protective of the right to life, opposing birth control (hence the seven kids) as well as abortion, regardless if the woman was raped.

By: Mia Bencivenga

I have cracked.  I have been broken.  I have crumbled under the temptation.  

Judge me.  I understand.  After all, it’s evident that I have a problem.  I am, in fact, writing once more, despite promising myself that I would never again tread down this road, about a Miss Kimberly Kardashian.  And as I walk this path, cold and alone, tripping over broken road signs entirely composed out of fake nails and self-indulgence, I wonder how I could have fallen this far once again.  

But here I am.  And here I shall blog. 

By: Mia Bencivenga

Well, my dear friends, award season is finally upon us.  

With it comes the glamor, the pageantry, the decadence, and in some cases, the mind numbing, nausea-inducing irritation that comes with viewing the endless barrage of red carpet coverage; and let’s not forget the numerous awkward conversations between Ryan Seacrest and Scarlet Johansson’s breasts.  

Ryan, we know she has massive knockers.  After all, they are in large part responsible for the majority of acting jobs she has acquired throughout the years.  She knows it.  We know it.  Everyone knows it.  You don’t need to draw attention to it by talking directly into her chest.  Contain yourself.  I mean, for Christ’s sake, you are just about the most licentious metrosexual man on television, with exception to the boys of the Jersey Shore. 

I am lucky enough to be on Lisa Davis' radio show on It’s Your Health Radio all week long! We have been having some great conversations and today's is no exception!

Twoday’s Topic: Sex and Politics

Read on for the link to listen to the show!

By: Mia Bencivenga

Marriage.  

In many cultures, it is considered to be a sacred sacrament, one that seemingly binds two people together for an eternity, so that they may worship, procreate, cohabitate, and even decorate as a single collaborative unit.  

Once married, you are in it for better and for worst, richer and poorer, in sickness and in health. You are expected to love your partner unconditionally; accept your partners flaws, even if that means tolerating their gaudy taste in silverware.  

Well, theoretically.

By: Mia Bencivenga

Picture this:  You’ve just watched sixteen-year-old heartthrob, Justin Bieber, sing his prepubescent heart out at the staples center in Lost Angeles.  His white boy gangsta style, smooth moves, and lack of facial hair have got your heart beating faster than a hummingbird’s wings.  The fact that he could double for an adult lesbian also turns you on, because clearly, when it comes to picking out potential partners, you have questionable taste.

Who among us hasn’t gotten a little handsy?

I really was trying to stay away from this circus. I have commented on a lot of political scandals this year, as have my fellow contributors to twoday magazine, and I really wanted to let one slide. I figured, let’s see where this party bus is headed before I jump on.