Two Day Magazine

By: Mia Bencivenga

Well, my dear friends, award season is finally upon us.  

With it comes the glamor, the pageantry, the decadence, and in some cases, the mind numbing, nausea-inducing irritation that comes with viewing the endless barrage of red carpet coverage; and let’s not forget the numerous awkward conversations between Ryan Seacrest and Scarlet Johansson’s breasts.  

Ryan, we know she has massive knockers.  After all, they are in large part responsible for the majority of acting jobs she has acquired throughout the years.  She knows it.  We know it.  Everyone knows it.  You don’t need to draw attention to it by talking directly into her chest.  Contain yourself.  I mean, for Christ’s sake, you are just about the most licentious metrosexual man on television, with exception to the boys of the Jersey Shore. 

I am lucky enough to be on Lisa Davis' radio show on It’s Your Health Radio all week long! We have been having some great conversations and today's is no exception!

Twoday’s Topic: Sex and Politics

Read on for the link to listen to the show!

I am lucky enough to be on Lisa Davis' radio show all week long discussing fantastic and provocative topics from your very own twoday magazine! Enjoy my latest radio appearance with the always wonderful, Lisa Davis, from It’s Your Health Radio!

Twoday’s Topic: Should You Ever Date Your Best Friend's Ex? Touchy topic! 

Enjoy my latest radio appearance with the always wonderful, Lisa Davis, from It’s Your Health Radio!

Twoday’s Topic: Virgin Diaries (A very entertaining chat about our sex-obsessed culture!)

By: Mia Bencivenga

I, like many other children, was raised Catholic.

For those of you who are not familiar with exactly what that entails, please allow me to sum up our important sacraments.

Shortly after your birth, a priest dunks your head into holy water, thereby cleansing yourself of the “original sin” we are all born with, because Eve had a little bit of an attitude problem with God and went ahead and ate some forbidden fruit.  This is called “Baptism.” 

“Will you marry me?”

It is amazing as to how those four little words can change your life. Of course you want the scenario to be perfect. Of course you want your soon-to-be betrothed to remember that moment for the rest of their lives. But part of the excitement and the anticipation comes from planning that intimate, romantic moment yourself.

So why outsource it?

By: Mia Bencivenga

Marriage.  

In many cultures, it is considered to be a sacred sacrament, one that seemingly binds two people together for an eternity, so that they may worship, procreate, cohabitate, and even decorate as a single collaborative unit.  

Once married, you are in it for better and for worst, richer and poorer, in sickness and in health. You are expected to love your partner unconditionally; accept your partners flaws, even if that means tolerating their gaudy taste in silverware.  

Well, theoretically.

It’s never too late to start taking better care of yourself!

This is not a diet plan, I promise. There is nothing worse than perusing the internet, looking for motivation to start eating better, and all that is bombarding you are fad diets and reasons why you can’t lose weight. Well, fear not, dear readers. Here are some positive habits to pick up in 2012....and the side effect? Well, you may drop a few pounds, but more importantly, you will start to feel great!

By: Mia Bencivenga

Picture this, if you will…you’ve just divorced your wife of over six years.

And, oh the pain and the vulnerability you must be feeling! The excruciating shame that one can experience when something like a marriage fails! Especially considering it was your infidelity that may or may not have broken up the marriage... Ah, surely, these are emotions that almost any individual in this kind of a situation would feel.

Yes, the time it will take you to heal will most likely be extensive; you’ll probably need at least six months of Ben and Jerry’s good old fashion ice cream therapy to recuperate from what has proven to be an arduous, traumatizing process.

But maybe, just maybe, someday you will reemerge from all of this, stronger than ever. And perhaps, find the will to love again.

And of course, you want to be kind to your now ex-wife, whose life you shared for almost a decade, by being considerate when you do meet that special someone. Because after all, that’s just common decency…

By: Mia Bencivenga

These days, if I don’t see someone face-tweeting a picture of themselves drunkenly bent over a toilet and giving a peace sign to the camera in between dry-heaves, I consider it to be one of those rare “good days.”

Let me be frank: I intensely dislike Twitter. First and foremost, I never have anything to tweet about. When I do tweet, I attempt to be funny. I type something, hate it, delete it, and thus my profile looks as if it hasn’t been updated since late September.

And I REFUSE to tell people about the mundane activities of my life, no matter how unintentionally hilarious others may find them.

Some called Arunachalam Muruganantham a pervert, some called him psychotic, and others believed he was dabbling in black magic. But I think of him as a truly evolved man, a real feminist, someone who goes that extra mile to help the women in his life! In essence, it takes a real man to wear a maxi pad!

When we think of phone sex operators, we often want to envision young, pretty, single women who are just so eager to talk naughty on the other end of the line. What we don’t want to think about are “real-life” moms with kids who are taking these jobs because the rent was due, like, yesterday.

By: Mia Bencivenga

The time is now upon us.

Don your red Santa hat, down some eggnog, and feel free to yell “ho ho ho” with no legal repercussions!  Yes, at last, ‘tis that magical time of the year.

Let’s play a game. Can you pick out all of the disturbing quotes in Perry’s latest ad? Here are some of the fun things I was able to pick out...what did you notice?

This is a very interesting video. Watch Michele Bachmann as she tries to explain to teenagers that the LGBTQ have the “same civil rights” as heterosexuals because everyone has the right to marry someone of the opposite sex.