Two Day Magazine

By: Mia Bencivenga

Picture this, if you will…you’ve just divorced your wife of over six years.

And, oh the pain and the vulnerability you must be feeling! The excruciating shame that one can experience when something like a marriage fails! Especially considering it was your infidelity that may or may not have broken up the marriage... Ah, surely, these are emotions that almost any individual in this kind of a situation would feel.

Yes, the time it will take you to heal will most likely be extensive; you’ll probably need at least six months of Ben and Jerry’s good old fashion ice cream therapy to recuperate from what has proven to be an arduous, traumatizing process.

But maybe, just maybe, someday you will reemerge from all of this, stronger than ever. And perhaps, find the will to love again.

And of course, you want to be kind to your now ex-wife, whose life you shared for almost a decade, by being considerate when you do meet that special someone. Because after all, that’s just common decency…

By: Mia Bencivenga

These days, if I don’t see someone face-tweeting a picture of themselves drunkenly bent over a toilet and giving a peace sign to the camera in between dry-heaves, I consider it to be one of those rare “good days.”

Let me be frank: I intensely dislike Twitter. First and foremost, I never have anything to tweet about. When I do tweet, I attempt to be funny. I type something, hate it, delete it, and thus my profile looks as if it hasn’t been updated since late September.

And I REFUSE to tell people about the mundane activities of my life, no matter how unintentionally hilarious others may find them.

Some called Arunachalam Muruganantham a pervert, some called him psychotic, and others believed he was dabbling in black magic. But I think of him as a truly evolved man, a real feminist, someone who goes that extra mile to help the women in his life! In essence, it takes a real man to wear a maxi pad!

When we think of phone sex operators, we often want to envision young, pretty, single women who are just so eager to talk naughty on the other end of the line. What we don’t want to think about are “real-life” moms with kids who are taking these jobs because the rent was due, like, yesterday.

By: Mia Bencivenga

The time is now upon us.

Don your red Santa hat, down some eggnog, and feel free to yell “ho ho ho” with no legal repercussions!  Yes, at last, ‘tis that magical time of the year.

Let’s play a game. Can you pick out all of the disturbing quotes in Perry’s latest ad? Here are some of the fun things I was able to pick out...what did you notice?

This is a very interesting video. Watch Michele Bachmann as she tries to explain to teenagers that the LGBTQ have the “same civil rights” as heterosexuals because everyone has the right to marry someone of the opposite sex.

By: Mia Bencivenga

The most important thing an aspiring writer can learn is that in order to write, one must have something to write about.

Using this universal rule of the written word, I set off on my weekly journey of finding something interesting to titillate the handful of readers who are kind enough to glance over my work every once and a while.  And by “journeying” I mean rampant usage of google-type search engines, and the frequent stalking of a many celebrity news oriented websites.

But what did I find?

Diddly-squat.