I am 24 years old and have been married for about a year. My husband is older, he’s 32, and he’s doing really well in the banking industry. He keeps dropping hints that he really wants to have a baby, but I don’t think I’m ready. I just finished college, just got married, and I’m still not sure what I want to do with my life. He got really upset the other night, saying that “I married a woman so we could start a family, not so she could ‘find herself’.” I feel like he isn’t hearing me, and doesn’t care that I’m just not ready. How do I put off having kids with him for at least a few more years? I really wanted to just be married for a while and focus on my career. But now I’m worried if I don’t get pregnant soon, he’s going to be upset. Suggestions?
--Just Not Ready
My husband and I haven’t been getting along lately, and we have been having issues connecting both in and out of the bedroom. My girlfriend told me that having an open marriage could help save ours. I don’t know if I am comfortable with this idea, though, but at this point, I may be wiling to try it. I just don’t know, however, if my husband will be willing to “share” me, so to speak.
--Open and Honest
I recently caught my daughter and her boyfriend having sex in my house. My daughter is 16 and her boyfriend is 17. They were in her room and I came home earlier than they anticipated. Needless to say, it was incredibly awkward and awful and we (my daughter and I) haven’t spoken in three days. I don’t know how to broach the subject. Of course I don’t think she is old enough to be having sex, but I am also worried that if she is having sex, she isn’t having safe sex. I can tell she is mortified and doesn’t even want to look at me right now. She was so angry that I walked in on them and now she won’t speak to me. Is there any way to call a “cease fire?” Of course my husband is no help in this situation, he says that “I need to just forget about it.” But, obviously, that is easier said than done! Any suggestions?
I have kind of a weird question to ask. Last night in bed, my girlfriend asked me if we could role play. Sure, I don’t have any issue with that, but she wants to play the “dominant” one this time, and she said she has been fantasizing a lot about tying me up. As a man, I don’t feel comfortable with this role reversal. Usually, she’s the one that wants to be dominated, and that’s a role I feel much more comfortable in while we are in bed. I told her I didn’t want to, and she told me I was selfish. She then got up and slept on the couch. What the hell is going on? I thought our sex life was fine, but now it seems really off course. Any suggestions?
--I’m On Top
I've recently married my high school sweetheart. We broke up after high school for three years, in which time he dated (and slept with) many women. I only had one partner in that time frame. We got back together two years ago and have been inseperable ever since. We are so in love with each other and everything is going really well. However, since we have gotten married, I have become very uncomfortable with anything "new" in the bedroom because I feel like he has done everything and I don't know anything. What should I do? He says he doesn't care and that we have a lot of time to figure things out, but I feel a lot of pressure to perform like a porn star. Any suggestions?
My wife and I have been married for five years and our sex life has gotten pretty stale. We have twin boys who are in the toddler phase now and she just doesn’t seem that interested in me at this point. We have sex once or twice a week, but it always seems like she is doing me a favor, or that it is a chore. I tried buying her lingerie (she said it was uncomfortable). I tried giving us “alone time” by getting a hotel room (she just fell asleep). I don’t know what else to try? I know she loves me, and I love her, but I don’t want to end up cheating because I am not satisfied. Should I bring that up?
I have a really embarrassing problem. I cannot have an orgasm without my vibrator. I never even realized it before, but now that I have a serious boyfriend, he is really upset that he can’t get me off without the help of my “friend.” It’s actually causing a rift between us. Sex with him is great, but when it comes time for “my turn” he insists on trying to please me without my vibrator. I refuse to fake it, and then he gets upset that he can’t get me to come, and so he caves and hands me my vibrator. And of course, it makes me orgasm in like two minutes. I feel badly that I rely so much on it, and I was wondering if you had any advice on how to fix this? We really love each other, and he just feels inadequate in the bedroom. Any suggestions?
I have been dating this really great guy for about three months now, but I feel like something shady is going on. I have never been to his house, we only meet at my place or at the location we have decided to have our date at. It’s weird. He won’t tell me where he lives...only the general area, and he takes these really strange phone calls, keeping his voice down, like he doesn’t want me to hear. Whenever I ask who it was, he just says “wrong number” or “work.” But, I don’t believe him. So, the other night, he was taking a shower at my place (he always does after we have sex) and I went through his wallet (he always keeps his phone with him). I found a picture of two little kids and an attractive woman. I think this is his family. Am I crazy, or is this guy trying to live a double life?? What do I do?
My love life sucked this year. I work a high stress job (probably over 80 hours a week) and haven’t had the time to date. My friends keep telling me to do online dating, but that’s creepy, right? I’m not sure how to meet people with my schedule, and I want to fall in love in 2013. Any suggestions to help get me out of this love-less (and sex-less) rut?
--2013 (Year For Love)
My boyfriend recently caught me sexting my ex-boyfriend. It was a bad decision on my part, I know. He texted me late at night (drunk) and we got into some steamy conversation. My boyfriend found out and now he is threatening to break up with me if I don’t cut my ex out of my life. I don’t know what to do. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now, but I’ve known my ex for almost seven years. I don’t know if I want him out of my life, but I really love my boyfriend. What should I do?
I really need your advice. I've recently discovered that my boyfriend has an unusual fetish - at least I think he does. He has a foot fetish, but he is also into missing toes and amputees. I accidentally discovered this a little while ago, but was not very smart in dealing with it. I asked him about it but I also expressed how weird and freaky I think it is.... so naturally he said it's not true, he is not interested in it, he just also found it weird and that's why he was looking at it. So I let it go. This was a few months ago.
But recently, I saw that it came up again and I did a bit of snooping - I know I shouldn't have, but I did. And I found out that this has been going on for quite a while now, even before he met me. He doesn't take it to the extreme, but I don't know what to do about it. Things are pretty serious between us, we've been together for almost two years and I love him very much, more than anything. I know he loves me too, there's no question about our feelings for each other. But I don't know how to deal with it - I'm not into this kind of stuff, but I also don't mind it very much. I just wish he would discuss it with me. I'm afraid what might happen if I tell him. I don't want things to end between us.
In what concerns our sex life, it's not very spicy - we don't have sex very often, until now because of space and family proximity issues. In the last month we have moved in together into our own apartment, and I thought things would change, but they haven't. Upon discovering these thoughts of his, I'm thinking that may be the reason we don't have sex.
At first I was really freaked out about this fetish, but then again, it shouldn't really change things between us - he is still the same guy I fell in love with 2 years ago.... I just don't know what would be better: to talk to him about it or to just try to ignore it (although this second version is a bit harder, it's all I think about since I've found out....)
I really need some advice on how to tackle this situation
Thank you very much,
I waited to lose my virginity on my wedding night. My husband and I were both virgins, and we were so excited to “do it”, but we ended up feeling so uncomfortable and embarrassed, that nothing even happened. We even got into an argument about the whole situation and we still haven’t done it. It’s been almost two weeks now...how do I get us over this bump in the road? We never even kissed before our wedding day and even that has felt strange. I don’t know what to do? I’m too embarrassed to ask my family and he certainly isn’t going to bring it up to his!
I recently discovered that my wife has been having an affair with a co-worker of hers. I am devastated and don’t know what to do. She told me she is over the marriage and wants me to move out. But, she’s the one who had the affair, she should move out. She says it’ll be “too disruptive” for the kids if she leaves, but I’m the one who does most of the parenting. I don’t think I should have to move out. How do I convince her to leave?
My boyfriend recently discovered that I have a webcam show online that I “host” to make money. In actuality, I strip and masturbate in front of the camera for cash. It’s been helping to pay the bills and keep me afloat. Well, he walked in on me “working” the other night (we don’t live together and normally he calls before coming over...) and now we are fighting about it. He feels bad that he can’t “take care of me” and he is also pissed off because I lied to him. But I don’t think it is a big deal. I’m not hurting anyone and it isn’t like I meet any of these guys. They don’t even see my face! What should I do? He feels like he can’t trust me. And I feel like he needs to respect my choices. I love him so much, I don’t want this to break us up!
I have a bit of a dilemma. I am in love with my boyfriend, but I am not really interested in having sex with him, anymore. The sex has never been that great. He doesn’t really know what I like, and I guess I don’t really speak up in bed. What should I do? I feel uncomfortable telling him that he isn’t good in bed, but I also can’t keep avoiding sex. He’s starting to wonder what’s up. Any suggestions?
--Bored in Bed